How to pay off our national debt

If I log onto an online sports-book like sportsinteraction.com and put $20 on the following parlay:

- Saudi Arabia to win the 2013 Men's Handball World Championship
- Bjorn Haneveer to win the 2013 World Snooker Championship
- South Alabama University to beat University of Louisiana Monroe in football today
- Yusaf Mack to beat Karl Froch in next month's IBF Super Middleweight championship bout
- Universidad SC to beat Deportivo Malacateco in tomorrow's Guatemalan soccer league match
- Gloria Bistrita to beat Steaua Bucuresti in tomorrow's Romanian soccer league match
- Jamie Caven to win the 2013 PDC (Darts) World Championship

My $20 bet will pay out $135,291,500,744,400

Our national debt is less than $17,000,000,000,000

So that means we'll have at least $117,000,000,000,000 left over to finance the rigging of these events.

I guarantee I could rig the World Championship of Darts with a trillion dollars. And if I tell Karl Froch I'll give him a billion dollars to lay down in his fight next month, he'd be the happiest man in the world because not only would he be a billionaire, but wouldn't have to box anymore.

The only part of this plan that might be challenging is collecting the $135 trillion from the sports book. But lets worry about that later. Maybe our creditors will accept IOU's from the sports-book.