Wednesday, December 01, 2010

random stuff about TV (and requisite tangents)

One bonus of staying with my parents over Thanksgiving was having access to their cable tv.

I watched an interview with Sarah Palin, and it really made me feel sorry for her. It seems like she's in way over her head. In addition to her obvious deficiencies, remember when her 17 year-old daughter (Bristol) got pregnant out of wedlock during the 2008 campaign?

That couldn't have sat well with Palin's conservative base. And just imagine how her advisors took the news.

Here's a serious question: Upon learning that 17 year-old Bristol Palin was pregnant out of wedlock, what percentage of Sarah Palin's advisors wanted to spin the story by claiming that Bristol's Palin's child had been immaculately conceived?

(25%?)

(40%?)

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I watched part of a Science Channel program about the Earth's atmosphere, and it made me want to learn about chemistry. I watch Planet Earth all the time and it makes me want to learn about biology.

Maybe high school science classes should be taught with the goal of simply sparking a student's interest in science -- as opposed to going in-depth. (Memorizing the periodic table meant nothing to me.) It didn't seem like we spent enough time learning about how the different fields of science can teach us about the world around us.

Teachers should save the details for college. High school science should be more fun.

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I saw a bunch of Blockbuster video commercials that went like this: First, customers were told they had to wait 28 days for a table at a restaurant, then other customers were told they had to wait 28 days for a delayed flight, and then the punch-line: "You wouldn't wait 28 days for a table, so why wait 28 days to watch a newly released movie? Blockbuster gets new releases 28 days before Netflix and Redbox. So why wait?"

Are people that impatient?

A Netflix subscriber has access to practically every movie ever made, so they can probably find something to watch during those 28 days. I watched Annie Hall on Netflix for the first time last week (and it came out 33 years ago.) There's plenty of stuff to hold people over for 28 measly days.

I hope Blockbuster can find a better advantage to emphasize.

If you really want to feel like you're being patronized, watch the commercials during a football game. You'd think that all American men want to drive big powerful trucks and drink light beer.

I wonder what marketing works on me.

(How about the two colons in the first sentence of this section?)

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I'm a snob.

For a man who's accomplished nothing in his life, I'm incredibly arrogant.

I'm almost unbelievably arrogant.

It's really pretty funny.

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My favorite feature on my parent's cable is the ability to rewind and slow down what I just watched.

My second favorite feature is On-Demand.

And it's crazy how you can just record a show and save it on your cable box!

How do people with cable get anything done?

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I think that the Blockbuster commercial really stuck out for me because I've become borderline obsessed with the Netflix app on my phone. (I watched a few movies on it last week.)

Quick notes on a few documentaries in case you're in the mood for one:

No End in Sight: About the war in Iraq, I recommend it. The thesis is unique in the sense that it doesn't argue that sending troops into Iraq to overthrow Saddam Hussein was terrible idea, rather it shows how poorly every aspect of the invasion was handled.

I'd recommend it over documentaries like War Made Easy and Fahrenheit 911, because it doesn't necessarily portray the administration as unimaginably corrupt and evil, it simply portrays them as being extremely incompetent and stupid (and imaginably corrupt.)

(Why We Fight is also a good war documentary)

South of the Border is short series of interviews with Socialist leaders of South American countries. I don't know how socialist governments actually work -- is the line drawn at land ownership? is Denmark considered socialist? -- but whether you agree with it or not, the film demonstrates that Socialism is a growing movement in South America.

Other docs I highly recommend:

Cocaine Cowboys -- about the role of cocaine in building Miami's economy (interesting economics lesson, plus lots of drug smuggling/war stories)
Tyson -- about Mike Tyson
American Pimp -- about urban pimps
Bigger, Stronger, Faster -- about steroid use in America (but also a cultural commentary)
Deep Water -- about a relatively novice sailor who enters a competition to sail around the world
Food Inc. -- about the perils of industrial agriculture

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New addition to the blogroll: I just learned that my friend's dad has a blog, and it's pretty good. He's a longtime newsman (I think he's the best newsman in the city, this is his show) and you can tell he's an experienced newsman because his blog entries are very short and well written, and they touch on random topics of interest.

(again about me being a snob: I'M CALLING HIM THE BEST NEWSMAN IN THE CITY, AND THEN IN THE SAME SENTENCE I HAVE THE NERVE TO ASSURE MY READERS THAT HIS POSTS ARE "WELL WRITTEN")

(NO SHIT!! OF COURSE THEY'RE WELL WRITTEN!!)

WHO AM I TO COMMENT ON THE QUALITY OF PHIL PONCE'S WRITING????????

I'd probably get down on my knees and beg him for any kind of job on his show (except for cleaning bathrooms) (but I'd bring him coffee and pick up his dry-cleaning and do that sort of stuff) (shining his shoes and giving him massages is probably around the area where I'd consider drawing the line) and yet here I am, assuring people who can sit through my blog, that this man -- who is nothing less than a Chicago journalism icon -- has blog posts that are "well written"

Man, I might need to check into some kind of arrogance therapy. Is there such a thing arrogance management classes? 

Am I just an asshole?

Is it that simple?

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Serious suggestion:

A female co-worker (Ena) was going on today about how she wants to take part in a program that uses female volunteers to hold orphaned children. She was very eager to do this.

And at that moment it struck me what women should do if they really want to help out the less fortunate.

If a woman truly wants to help the less fortunate, she should take off her clothes and dance for them.

I know, I know, trust me, I know how that sounds.

But what would bring a bigger smile to a homeless man's face than a woman's bare ass shaking in front of it?

Listen, I know that this idea couldn't be less politically correct, and I know it's probably not going to change the course of these homeless men's lives, but you've gotta admit, it'll probably be something that they'll never forget.

Maybe we can make it a charity that collects money and then hires professional strippers to dance for homeless men (and women).

("Maybe we can make it a charity..."  apparently you're in this with me.)

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If you're in the mood to read about something fucked up

...

It's getting late and I want to go to sleep, but I really don't want to end this post with that "If you're in the mood to read about something fucked up" section.

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